Jesus Called Me This Morning

Trust me in the depths of your being.

It is there that I live in constant communion with you. When you feel flustered and frazzled on the outside (um...quite often), do not get upset with yourself. You are only human (Amanda), and the swirl of events going on all around you will sometimes (or all the time) feel overwhelming. Rather than scolding yourself for your humanness, remind yourself that I am both with you and within you. (Thank heavens).

I am with you at all times, encouraging and supportive rather than condemning. I know that deep within you, where I live, My peace is your continual experience (make it more so, Lord).

*Slow down your pace of living for a time. Quiet your mind in My presence.*

Then you will be able to hear Me bestowing the resurrection blessing: Peace be with you.

-Sarah Young, Jesus Calling (parentheses mine)


That whole slow down your pace of living line...boy, does that resonate. I find myself more irritated with Emily than ever lately because she is showing her individuality more and more. I think that there is a fine line (I'm still looking for it) between demanding her immediate obedience and understanding that there are lots of things going through that little mind of hers; she is discovering this big world and it can be and is confusing for her. She is very particular and methodical about how things are done. I need to understand that she doesn't think just like I do and she doesn't understand why it might not matter in the long run if she does or does not put that pretend skillet full of stickers (or eggs) in the kitchen cabinet very gently (and slooowly) on top of the stack of pots only to cause the entire stack to clank to the marble floor RIGHT before we have to leave the house to make it to an appointment barely on time. All the while Anderson has escaped to the bathroom to splash around in the toilet water, might I add.

There are things that are incredibly important to a three-year-old that adults will never understand because we've lost our sense of imagination and have allowed the "real" world to become superior to child-like wonder, play, and imagination. Would she or I benefit from me being obviously irritated and rushing over to throw the pots in the cupboard, grab her hand, and drag her out the door? When I do things like that, her spirit is crushed. She asks me, "Mommy, are you happy?" when I am obviously not.
 She knows.
 She's smart.

 I don't want to be a spirit crushing, madly demanding, irritable mother.

 Or would she and I benefit most from me remaining calm, slowing down our pace of life, helping her put the "eggs back on the stove", and asking if she will share her breakfast with me when we get home from our errand? That sounds much better.

 I want to be a mother that fosters her healthy independence, her incredible imaginary skills, and understands that she is a quirky three year old.

She needs that from me.
 I expect it of myself.
But, I need the grace from God to slow down.
I need Him to increase my eagerness to listen before I speak and seek to understand before I demand understanding. Even from a three-year-old.

Thank you, Jesus, for calling this morning.